[senco-forum] Death

Our Service supported a Year 11 girl with Ehlers-Danlos syndrome (type not

I have taught several students who knew that death was likely to be soon for 
them.

Ands each one wanted to "grab what they could of life" - experience 
everything they could before the end came for them.

And they also wanted to be like everybody else - do the same things and 
share the same experiences.  And they all kept going full out living life 
for as long as they could - trying to ignore their various conditions - when 
their parents - and the school staff - were actually wanting to keep them 
safe and sought to limit any risk in their lives.

They wanted to be on the school bus - not picked up by parents - they wanted 
to camp - travel abroad - party - drink - and one hoped he would live long 
enough for sex!

And I suspect that most of us would go for the "safe option" - as I did - 
more than once - until you face your own demise - and you appreciate just 
what those children were asking for - to taste everything life had to offer 
before their brief lives came to an end.

I would now support any child's wishes in these circumstances - and 
hopefully try to retain - at least for a while - what I saw as the 
sustaining links.

They will have their "wishes" for such a short time - and being protective 
does not let them at least try all the things they actually wish to do.

Regards

Ruth - who also thinks that they might try some poetry too - because there 
is a lot out there that will reassure some students that they are not the 
first - nor the only people to feel as they do - "When I have fears that I 
may cease to be" - "To strive, to seek, to find - and not to yield" - "How 
will fare the world whose wonder was the very proof of me" - "Rage, rage 
against the dying of the light"  etc etc etc

----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Biff Crabbe" <ba at biffc.vispa.com>
To: "KEVIN HEALY" <kevinhealy at btinternet.com>; 
<senco-forum at lists.becta.org.uk>
Sent: Sunday, February 11, 2007 8:41 PM
Subject: Re: [senco-forum] Death

> Our Service supported a Year 11 girl with Ehlers-Danlos syndrome (type not
> then determined) last year.  She also wanted to go on to FE, rather than
> stay on at her school's sixth form.
>
> We supported that choice, because it was what she wanted to do.  Although 
> we
> become particularly concerned to provide caring support for a young person
> in these circumstances, it's inevitably tinged with a desire to protect.
> But colleagues who have (far too much) experience of working with children
> who have terminal illnesses often report that the child wants to remain
> engaged in education, following as normal a path as possible, until it
> becomes impossible to do so.
>
> Without making light of the subject of death, which is destiny for all of
> us, I'm still left wondering whether a forum thread entitled 'Death' is an
> improvement on the threads that you're fed up with.
>
> Regards
>
> Biff Crabbe
>
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "KEVIN HEALY" <kevinhealy at btinternet.com>
> To: <senco-forum at lists.becta.org.uk>
> Sent: Sunday, February 11, 2007 5:13 PM
> Subject: [senco-forum] Death
>
>
>> I am getting very fed up with certain strands taking over SENCO Forum.
> Can we please get back to those we work with and their needs.
>>   I have a Year 11 girl who has Ehlers-Danloss type 4.  For thosw who
> don't know and this will be almost everyone on the forum, I only learnt
> about it when she came to us.  This condition is genetic, where parents
> genes determine it.
>>   This is a degenerative condition, where there is bleeding under the
> skin, dislocation and strokes which obviously affect functioning.  We work
> closely with the specialists, and our young person and her family are
> determined to carry on as normal.  At her last annual review we discussed
> the move from Year 11 to the future.  Sh eprefers the local FE college but
> the course she has chosen will not be supported, we have suggested our 
> joint
> 6th form with our " partner school", she wants to go to college, in my 
> heart
> of hearts I know she needs to stay with people who know her.
>>   Don't think I am criticising our local college, they have done 
>> fantastic
> work with loads of SEN students.  My problem is this student could die
> tomorrow, at school we are ready having had 3 students die in the past 4
> years, however where do I direct her ?
>>   To an Fe college of 2000 where she is unknown, or to a joint 6th form 
>> of
> 150, where her needs are known, but which she tells me she would not like 
> to
> go to as she wants to go to college.
>>   Lets get back to what really is why we are doing what we are doing.
>>   Sue
>>   P.S. her parents, Mum and sister are teachers and brother is in Iraq, 
>> so
> we are also contending with that, are ambivalent about the whole thing.
>>   Sue
>>
>>
>> --
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>>
>
>
> 