[senco-forum] (almost) Friday funnies

Dear All,
     A short selection to bring on the weekend
  Janet
  What do you call a Scottish cloakroom attendant? 

Angus McCoatup
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  A tour bus driver is driving with a bus load of OAPs when he is tapped on his shoulder by a little old lady. 
  She offers him a handful of peanuts, which he gratefully munches up. 
  After about 15 minutes, she taps him on his shoulder again and she hands him another handful of peanuts. 
  When she is about to hand him another batch again he asks her: "Why don`t you eat the peanuts yourself?"
  "We can't chew them because we've no teeth", she replied. 

"We just love the chocolate around them." 
  888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888
    What do you call 100 nuns in a shop? Virgin Megastore.

  What's the most dangerous insect? The hepatitis bee
    Q: WHAT'S the difference between outlaws and inlaws 

A. outlaws are wanted! 

  How do you kill an entire circus? Go for the juggler
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  The new French cook  The French will eat almost anything. A young cook decided that the French would enjoy feasting on rabbits and decided to raise rabbits in Paris and sell them to the finer restaurants in the city. He searched all over Paris seeking a suitable place to raise his rabbits. None could be found. Finally, an old priest at the cathedral said he could have a small area behind the rectory for his rabbits. He successfully raised a number of them, and when he went about Paris selling them, a restaurant owner asked him where he got such fresh rabbits. The young man replied, "I raise them myself, near the cathedral. In fact, I have ... a hutch back of Notre Dame.
    Q:What do you say to an army officer as you're about to run him or her over with a steam roller?
A: Be flat, major.

  Two lawyers were out hunting when they came upon a couple of tracks. After close examination, the first lawyer declared them to be deer tracks. The second lawyer disagreed, insisting they must be elk tracks.

They were still arguing when the train hit them.