[senco-forum] [?? Probable Spam] Re: teenagers!- responsibility as parent

Vocation has a good point don't apologise- it's your job to look, at least untill they are old enough to live independant lives.

Hi

I'm in favour of apologies- sorry- but the word is only 50 %- the most 
important part is the 50% action - don;t do it again !

I'm sorry but I don;t understand the reference to Edam- I like it as 
well but do not know the context, sorry.

I had an interesting situation with 13 yr old daughter last weekend.

She came back from girlfriends house - i picked her up at 11pm- I heard 
clunk when she placed bag on floor then went to bed- I looked in her 
bag- yes this is 1000000% permissible without her permission - inside I 
found my bottle of 12 yr old malt whisky- opened but not drunk.

So, I asked for explanation- nothing was forthcoming- I said-

1. you will be punished because you stole form me
2. you have no rights to take alcohol to another persons house.
3. how do you think your relationship with the parents would have 
changed if your friend had become ill with alcohol intake.
4. what trust would the parents have in you from now on and what trust 
have you broken with me

Just to clarify, I am not anti alcohol, I'm not a drinker of more than 
one glass of wine per week etc... so this will stop anyone assuming any 
of these factors are a part of my opinion.

What do you think ?

Aaron Watson wrote:
> Vocation has a good point don't apologise- it's your job to look, at least untill they are old enough to live independant lives. 
>
> My kids all know we informally monitor what they are up to and accept that their mobile phones are not private nor are their bebo accounts. 
>
> However, we don't check without a reallygood reason. For example, my second daughter's behaviour changed recently. After a bit of digging my wife discovered the root cause. My daughter had been asked to keep the situation a secret by her friend. However, once we knew what the issue was, a bit of careful questioning got her to tell all. After that we talked through with her what needed to be done. We had a quiet word with her friend's parents and the situation has now been resolved. My daughter was quite relieved that we had kept tabs on her  and she was glad that the burden of responsibility was taken away from her.
>
> I don't think anyone needs to make a spoken apology right away (if ever). I don't know about anyone else but we discuss stuff like this at the dinner table and often nominate each other fairly pointless punishments, usually after lots of laughter. 
>
> I am now 5 years into a lifelong Edam ban after running out of mozarella and substituting a lower quality dutch alternative! I really like Edam and every time I see the stuff in the supermarket I am reminded about the need to be honest with the kids!
>
> Keep Smiling!!!
>
> A
>
>
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